Chapter 12 The Noble Eightfold Path: Right Speech Discussion Assignment Write a paragraph about right speech (The Noble Eightfold Path: Right Speech)Right

Chapter 12 The Noble Eightfold Path: Right Speech Discussion Assignment Write a paragraph about right speech (The Noble Eightfold Path: Right Speech)Right speech is about being impeccable with your words. Refraining from lying, divisive speech, harsh speech, and meaningless speech CHAPTER TWELVE
Right Speech
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“Aware of the suffering caused by unmindful speech and the
inability to listen to others, I am committed to cultivating lov-
ing speech and deep listening in order to bring joy and hap-
piness to others and relieve others of their suffering. Knowing
that words can create happiness or suffering, I am deter:
mined to speak truthfully, with words that inspire self-confi-
dence, joy, and hope. I will not spread news that I do not
know to be certain and will not criticize or condemn things of
which I am not sure. I will refrain from uttering words that
can cause division or discord, or that can cause the family or
the community to break. I am determined to make all efforts
to reconcile and resolve all conflicts, however small.” This is
the Fourth Mindfulness Training,’ and it offers a very good
description of Right Speech (samyag vac).
In our time, communication techniques have become very
sophisticated. It takes no time at all to send news to the other
side of the planet. But at the same time, communication be-
tween individuals has become very difficult. Fathers cannot
talk to sons and daughters. Husbands cannot talk to wives,
nor partners to partners. Communication is blocked. We are
in a very difficult situation, not only between countries but
person to person. Practicing the Fourth Mindfulness Training
The classical explanation of Right Speech is: (1) Speaking
is very important.
See Thich Nhat Hanh, For a Future To Be Possible. See also chap. 13.
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RIGHT SPEECH
truthfully. When something is green, we say it is green, and
not purple. (2) Not speaking with a forked tongue. We don’t
say one thing to one person and something else to another.
Of course, we can describe the truth in different ways to help
different listeners understand our meaning, but we must al-
ways be loyal to the truth. (3) Not speaking cruelly. We don’t
shout, slander, curse, encourage suffering, or create hatred.
Even those who have a good heart and don’t want to hurt oth-
ers sometimes allow toxic words to escape from their lips. In
our mind are seeds of Buddha and also many fetters or inter-
nal formations (samyojana). When we say something poison-
ous, it is usually because of our habit energies. Our words are
very powerful. They can give someone a complex, take away
their purpose in life, or even drive them to suicide. We must
not forget this. (4) Not exaggerating or embellishing. We
don’t dramatize unnecessarily, making things sound better,
worse, or more extreme than they actually are. If someone is
a little irritated, we don’t say that he is furious. The practice
of Right Speech is to try to change our habits so that our
speech arises from the seed of Buddha that is in us, and not
from our unresolved, unwholesome seeds.?
Right Speech is based on Right Thinking. Speech is the
way for our thinking to express itself aloud. Our thoughts are
no longer our private possessions. We give earphones to oth-
ers and allow them to hear the audiotape that is playing in
our mind. Of course, there are things we think but do not
want to say, and one part of our consciousness has to play the
role of editor. If there is something we think we will be criti-
cized for saying, the editor will censor it. Sometimes when a
friend or a therapist asks us an unexpected question, we are
provoked into telling the truth we wanted to hide.
Sometimes, when there are blocks of suffering in us, they
See Samyukta Agama 785 and Majjhima Nikaya 117. See also Thich Nhat
Hanh, For a Future To Be Possible.
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THE HEART OF THE BUDDHA’S TEACHING
may manifest as speech (or actions) without going through
the medium of thought. Our suffering has built up and can
no longer be repressed, especially when we have not been
practicing Right Mindfulness. Expressing our suffering can
Right Mindfulness, we may not know what is building up in
harm us and other people as well, but when we don’t practice
side us. Then we say or write things we did not want to say,
and we don’t know where our words came from. We had no
intention of saying something that could hurt others, yet we
say such words. We have every intention of saying only words
that bring about reconciliation and forgiveness, but then we
say something very unkind. To water seeds of peace in our
selves, we have to practice Right Mindfulness while walking,
sitting, standing, and so on. With Right Mindfulness, we see
clearly all of our thoughts and feelings and know whether this
or that thought is harming or helping us. When our thoughts
leave our mind in the form of speech, if Right Mindfulness
continues to accompany them, we know what we are saying
and whether it is useful or creating problems.
Deep listening is at the foundation of Right Speech. If we
cannot listen mindfully, we cannot practice Right Speech. No
matter what we say, it will not be mindful, because we’ll be
speaking only our own ideas and not in response to the other
person. In the Lotus Sutra, we are advised to look and listen
with the eyes of compassion. Compassionate listening brings
about healing. When someone listens to us this way, we feel
some relief right away. A good therapist always practices deep,
compassionate listening. We have to learn to do the same in
order to heal the people we love and restore communication
with them.
When communication is cut off, we all suffer. When no
one listens to us or understands us, we become like a bomb
ready to explode. Restoring communication is an urgent task.
Sometimes only ten minutes of deep listening can transform
us and bring a smile back to our lips. The Bodhisattva Kwan
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RIGHT SPEECH
Yin is the one who hears the cries of the world. She has the
quality of listening deeply, without judging or reacting. When
we listen with our whole being, we can defuse a lot of bombs.
If the other person feels that we are critical of what they are
saying, their suffering will not be relieved. When psychothera-
pists practice Right Listening, their patients have the courage
to say things they have never been able to tell anyone before.
Deep listening nourishes both speaker and listener.
Many of us have lost our capacity for listening and using
loving speech in our families. It may be that no one is capable
of listening to anyone else. So we feel very lonely even within
our own families. That is why we have to go to a therapist,
hoping that she is able to listen to us. But many therapists
also have deep suffering within. Sometimes they cannot listen
as deeply as they would like. So if you really love someone,
train yourself to be a listener. Be a therapist. You may be the
best therapist for the person you love if you know how to
train yourself in the art of deep, compassionate listening. You
must also use loving speech. We have lost our capacity to say
things calmly. We get irritated too easily. Every time we open
our mouths, our speech becomes sour or bitter. We know it’s
true. We have lost our capacity for speaking with kindness.
This is the Fourth Mindfulness Training. This is so crucial to
restoring peaceful and loving relationships. If you fail in this
training, you cannot succeed in restoring harmony, love, and
happiness. That is why practicing the Fourth Mindfulness
Training is a great gift.
So many families, couples, and relationships have been
broken because we have lost the capacity of listening to each
other with calmness and compassion. We have lost the capac-
ity of using calm and loving speech. The Fourth Mindfulness
Training is very important to restore communication between
us. Practicing the Fourth Training on the art of listening and
the art of loving speech is a great gift. For example, a family
member may suffer very much. No one in the family has been
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THE HEART OF THE BUDDHA’S TEACHING
able to sit quietly and listen to him or her. If there is someone
capable of sitting calmly and listening with his or her heart
for one hour, the other person will feel a great relief from his
suffering. If you suffer so much
and no one has been able to
listen to your suffering, your suffering will remain there. But
if someone is able to listen to you and understand you, you
will feel relief after one hour of being together.
In Buddhism, we speak of the Bodhisattva Avalokiteshvara,
Kwan Yin, a person who has a great capacity of listening with
compassion and true presence. “Kwan Yin” means the one
who can listen and understand the sound of the world, the
cries of suffering. Psychotherapists try to practice the same.
They sit very quietly with a lot of compassion and listen to
you. Listening like that is not to judge, criticize, condemn, or
evaluate, but to listen with the single purpose of helping the
other person suffer less. If they are able to listen like that to
you for one hour, you feel much better. But psychotherapists
have to practice so that they can always maintain compassion,
concentration, and deep listening. Otherwise, their quality of
listening will be very poor, and you will not feel better after
one hour of listening.
You have to practice breathing mindfully in and out so that
compassion always stays with you. “I am listening to him not
only because I want to know what is inside him or to give him
advice. I am listening to him just because I want to relieve his
suffering.” That is called compassionate listening. You have to
listen in such a way that compassion remains with you the
whole time you are listening. That is the art. If halfway
through listening irritation or anger comes up, then you can
not continue to listen. You have to practice in such a way that
can breathe in and out mindfully and continue to hold com-
every time the energy of irritation and anger comes up, you
passion within you. It is with compassion that you can listen to
another. No matter what he says, even if there
is a lot of
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