Santa Monica College Hamlet by Shakespeare Paper This is how it needs to be revised:the intro is succinct–good–sets the paper up well–the first body par

Santa Monica College Hamlet by Shakespeare Paper This is how it needs to be revised:the intro is succinct–good–sets the paper up well–the first body paragraph talks about both Hamlet and Laertes–not sure I would have done this –probably best to discuss one at a time–butyou designed it a slightly different way–not bad–but so much easier to just tackle one at a time, isn’t it? the second body paragraph [never start a par with moreover or furthermore–these are conjunctive adverbs and belong deep in paragraphs–on hamlet alone and claudius–next bod par [#3] is about laertes and the death of his father—then you turn to fortinbras–so it looks like you actually set it up to discuss one at a time but started with hamlet/laertes–and then the conclusion does a good job to reflect all three again–[but you need to indent paragraphs always–this is a mechanics issue bt very important–there are some grammar issues i can’t get into here because it’s not a word doc–w edit feature–but it does weaken somewhat–still, i like the development–the design after the first body par 12 [B+]I will post the paper once I pick the tutor